You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
