just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
