For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Randomize
