drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
