I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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