I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
