Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
