I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
