The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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