Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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