Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
he shaved USA in his pubs
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
