Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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