Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
