Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
