The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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