i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
