ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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