Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Randomize
