I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
