you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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