How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
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