were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
