"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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