He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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