I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
