Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
