You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
