Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize