You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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