just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
