Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
