week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
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