You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
