We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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