How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize