There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
