I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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