dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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