you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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