You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Randomize
