problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Randomize
