its not stalking. its research.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
He better not be in your backpack
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Randomize
