He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
