Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Need sex. Gaining weight.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
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