can u get pink eye on your cock?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize