life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
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