garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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