While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Randomize
