Nicole vs. Life
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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