I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
birth control should be required to get into college
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
