How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Randomize
