Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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