Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
